Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Mind undermining my attempts to stay awake
I divined some information about my job. Supposedly, I am to become unemployed again in January due to cutbacks. I just got this job in March after several months of unemployment and TWC told me that my benefits were exhausted, so I relied on savings and a loan from my ex-wife to make it. I easily paid her back from my tax refund. For a while I was anxious. I know intellectually that my mind is trying to subvert my progress and regain control. I can meditate and hold it at bay, but it like fighting a wild cat. I realize that the future is not yet writ and that what I have perceived may never come to pass. Yet my mind has found an insecurity to latch onto. I realize though that I have always landed on my feet and that times are tough for everyone. I suppose, this is another attachment for me to break so that I can enjoy the Now more fully. Blessings to everyone. Hopefully, I'll have something more profound to write about later.